A Thing for Egyptologists

This will be like ten blog posts in one, so please savor and enyoy.This week Passover continues, which means no leavened beers for me, leading to my drinking dangerous things like gin and getting very drunk and playing Twister at a bar with strangers. Bonzai.At my seder both a close family friend and the woman who used to be my parents' cleaning person and who now helps my mom at Passover, tried setting me up with their nieces. That was nice of them I think. I demurred. It's the bachelor life for me: dirty dishes and sports equipment everywhere.I watched most of "Reality Bites." Wait, no. I watched the entire thing. I haven't seen that movie in like ten years. Nobody has cell phones and people talk about AIDS a lot.The first time I saw it was when it came out. I related to the nerdy Jewish character and was appalled my sister liked Ethan Hawke. Then I saw it again when I was a teenager, and despite still being a nerdy Jew, just now one with long hair and flannel, I related to Hawke.Now I am 28 and I relate to neither. I guess that's a good thing.A few choice stories regarding my twin five year old fake nephews:They call my grandpa, entirely without irony, Mr. Dicklan-his name is Gitlin.They asked after dinner when the fireworks started as they came to believe there are fireworks at every holiday.One did some sort of butt-wiggle dance while asking the four questions.One declared it's ok to burp on Passover, then illustrated his point.On Friday we all went to the U. Penn Museum of Archaelogy which is probably my favorite museum in the country. It's also known as the Mummy Museum, as they have those there. Mummies.There was a group of high school students on a tour led by a very fetching woman who knew an amazing amount about ancient Egypt. I had to whisper while describing the gods to the twins, as I didn't want her to hear what a jackass I am. Apparently I have a thing for hot Egyptologists. I am not surprised.Not sure how I feel about this new Kelly/Erin character on the Office. She's pretty and all, but she's no Pam.